Every Team to Declare Their Interest in Lionel Messi

Lionel Messi is on the market.

Yes, really.

One of the greatest footballers of all time is looking for a new club after he requested to leave his current club because they're, well...how to put this...a complete and utter shambles.

So when the third greatest footballer of all time comes on the market, as expected, clubs are more than happy to shamelessly link themselves with a move for him even if they don't really have a chance in hell of signing him.

Still, it's worth a try...right?

Here are the clubs who have, so far, taken to Twitter to plead with Messi to join their club.

Sampdoria

If it's a lovely new kit Messi is after, then they don't come much lovelier than Samp's.

Independiente

A Newell's Old Boys return is the real fairytale story, but they haven't had the gall to get a graphic designer to create a cartoon Messi wearing their kit. Independiente have, and we rate it.

Fluminense

Ganso (remember him?) probably won't be too happy with seeing Messi's name attached to his shirt number.

Drogheda United

If Messi wants to play football in an industrial estate and eat the worst cheese burgers in the world - from experience, I can safely say that the burgers at United Park are horrific - then he should join Drogheda United.

Chicago Bulls

Last Dance 2.

Lionel Messi's swansong plays out at the Chicago Bulls.

The tiny Argentinian sits on a comfortable chair, looks into the camera and says: "they said I was too small to play basketball...and I took that personally."

Fresno Grizzlies

The move to the Chicago Bulls would be cool and all, but if Messi really wants to be like Mike then he'll leave the sport that he's the best in the world at to go play some Triple A baseball.

Lokomotiv Moscow

For years the city of Moscow has been crying out for a footballing superstar to replace Aidan McGeady - who enjoyed four remarkable years at Spartak.

Lionel Messi could be that superstar.

Cobh Ramblers

The club that put hairs on Roy Keane's chest could do the same for Messi.

Longford Town

Messi has reportedly always wanted to live right smack bang in the middle of Ireland.

Bangor City

From a quick Google Image search one can ascertain that Bangor is quite an aesthetically pleasing city and it has at least one Greggs. What more could you ask for?

Carrarese Calcio

Diego Maradona taking SSC Napoli from mid-table obscurity to Serie A dominance was pretty impressive, but Lionel Messi taking Carrarese Calcio from Serie C to Serie A dominance? Well that would be different gravy.

St. Mirren

Scottish football would be a culture shock for Leo...we'll put it that way...

Mercedes-AMG F1

On receiving this DM from Mercedes-AMG F1, Messi did a quick search on TripAdvisor for 'THE FIVE BEST Things to Do in Brackley', seen that the number two thing to do is visit an antique store, and quickly replied: "nah pal."

Repsol Honda Team

If Messi has a death wish, he will join a Moto GP team.

Carlton FC

If Messi has a death wish, he will go and play Aussie Rules football.

El Paso Locomotive

For the badge alone, El Paso Locomotive could well be the frontrunners to sign the Argentine forward.

Port Vale

Lionel Messi to the Port Vale chairman, with tears steaming down his face: "You had me at oatcakes. You had me at oatcakes."

Stevenage FC

Lionel Messi bloody loves Burger King.

Pentwynmawr Athletic

A* for effort Pentwynmawr Athletic.