God, it's good to have you back on our screens, Mr. Champions League.
You may not be as outright ludicrous as the big s***ting Barclays, but you're pretty damn close. How 'bout them Ukrainians?!
Shakhtar Under-16's 3-2 victory away at the Real Madrid was nothing short of miraculous and certainly the standout clash of what was an intriguing set of fixtures on matchday one.
The delayed start to the competition means we'll be doing it all over again next week; picking frantically at the last minute at what game to tune into, possibly bringing another device into play so you can have two games on the go or opting to play it safe with the thoroughly enjoyable Goals Show. It's a wonderful dilemma to have.
Nevertheless, we were treated to some superb individual displays on the return of Europe's premier competition just two months following the previous iteration's enthralling epilogue in Lisbon.
Thus, here's 90min's Champions League Team of the Week for matchday one.
1. Goalkeepers & Defenders
David de Gea (GK) - The Spaniard has rightly come under fire for his indifferent form over the past two years but he was at his imperious best in Paris. The save to deny Layvin Kurzawa at 0-0 was majestic but his work to prevent Kylian Mbappe early in the second period was even better. Overall, De Gea pulled off five saves on the night to make sure of United's deserved victory.
Aaron Wan-Bissaka (RB) - Some character this lad's got. After everything that emerged on social media in the build-up to Tuesday's trip to the Parc des Princes, to put in a display like that was mightily impressive. The Englishman produced six tackles on the night, almost thwarting PSG's two supreme protagonists alone with his freakish ability in one-v-one situations.
Axel Tuanzebe (CB) - First game back after ten months out? Neymar and Mbappe on the other side? Can someone hold Tuanzebe's beer, please? The United man was assured in all facets of his defensive work, producing some highlight reel-worthy moments against Mbappe as well. The 22-year-old's destined for a run Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's XI.
Fabinho (CB) - Who'd have thought it, eh? Fabinho was a better centre-half than Virgil van Dijk all along. The versatile Brazilian - a former right-back at Monaco - churned out a fantastic display at the heart of defence to 'save' an out-of-sync Liverpool side. His work to clear Dusan Tadic's cheeky lob off the line was the standout highlight in an incredibly composed display with and without the ball. MOTM on the night.
Angelino (LB) - The Spaniard' showed signs of evolution last season following his January move to RB Leipzig in January, with Julian Nagelsmann working wonders with the Manchester City cast-off. Angelino's enjoyed a fine start to the season in Germany and he proved the match-winner against İstanbul Başakşehir on Tuesday, scoring twice in a comfortable 2-0 victory. Would recommend having a re-watch of his first.
Fred (CM) - Ole's decision to stick with the McFred tandem in midfield against PSG was a bold one, but it worked. The tenacious Brazilian was particularly exceptional in the French capital, churning out a dominant display. Fred's intensity overwhelmed the visitors in the second phase as he completed a combined eight tackles and interceptions on the night. He was everywhere, and crucial in United's memorable triumph.
Joshua Kimmich (CM) - Florian Neuhaus and his majestic technique may feel aggrieved here, with compatriot Kimmich getting the nod instead. The German was typically all-action in Bayern's 4-0 defeat of Atletico Madrid on Wednesday night, with his work for the opening goal sublime; first, dominating a duel with a timid Joao Felix before delivering a dreamy diagonal pass for Kingsley Coman to finish.
Tete (RM) - It'd be nothing short of an injustice if we didn't include one of the Shakhtar boys - quite literally. Manor Solomon and Marcos Antonio were both immense, but it was 20-year-old Tete who had the people talking. The Brazilian opened the scoring with a precisely-taken left-footed effort before his crafty backheel set-up Solomon for Shakhtar's third.
Dominik Szoboszlai (AM) - God, Arsenal fans were quick to change their tune. After a summer of pleading Fabrizio Romano for Houssem Aouar updates, they're now all over Salzburg's Szoboszlai, and understandably so. There are very few who strike a ball sweeter than the Hungarian, which he proved with his guided missile of an effort in the Wednesday's 2-2 draw with Lokomotiv Moscow. The 19-year-old's undoubtedly the next superstar to emerge from Die Bullen's ranks.
Kingsley Coman (LM) - There are few sights superior in football than an on-song Kingsley Coman. The Frenchman's a pure entertainer and was superb in Bayern's rout of Atleti. He produced a Man of the Match performance in the absence of Serge Gnabry and Leroy Sane with a well-taken brace - his second was particularly brilliant - and an assist.
Alvaro Morata (ST) - This was such an Alvaro Morata performance; anonymous for the most part but still came away with a poacher's brace. Instincts helped him to his first before Juan Cuadrado's wicked delivery gifted the Spaniard his second on a platter - with Morata's header textbook. He's home, ladies and gentlemen.