There are some transfer rumours that dangle perilously on the border of the ridiculous. Then, there are some that simply defy belief and beg the question, why bother?
But keep calm, that is all to come soon enough on your Sunday edition of #thegossip, as Manchester United again feature heavily alongside a few other European heavyweights in what is an all-star lineup.
Put you feet up, stick the kettle on and settle in for your daily dose of potential player comings and goings.
PSG Want Umtiti
That rhymed if said stutteringly. You're welcome.
What isn't flowing as smoothly, however, is Samuel Umtiti's Barcelona career. A combination of injury and the fine form of Clement Lenglet have prevented the World Cup winner from making any more than two La Liga outings this season, as his days in Catalonia looked numbered.
Due to that, Calcio Mercato are reporting that PSG sporting director Leonardo is keeping tabs on the Frenchman. That's about it really, no mention of a January deal or what have you, but he is under contract until 2023, so it is safe to assume he's gonna cost some serious pennies to lure over.
Atletico Willing to Offer Ivan Rakitic Escape Route
It is hardly his fault, I mean, Frenkie De Jong is just too darn good. But nevertheless, the Dutchman is keeping Ivan Rakitic out of the Barcelona starting lineup and a January departure seems increasingly likely.
As per Movistar - a major telecommunications brand owned by Telefónica - and relayed by Sport, Atletico are willing to fork out €40m for the Croatian and will lodge such a bid when the window opens. It is noted that a whole host of Serie A sides are interested as well, mind you, with Juventus, Inter and Milan all in the running to secure his signature.
Either way, it looks almost nailed on that his 278-game spell for Barça will be coming to an end this winter.
Arsenal, Man Utd & Milan Keeping an Eye on Merih Demiral
Three clubs not doing particularly well this season reckon a defender could solve their issues. I mean, it makes sense, no?
Playing only one game for Juventus since signing from Sassuolo over the summer for €18m, Merih Demiral is still attracting suitors across Europe - with the aforementioned trio sending scouts to watch him in action for Turkey over the international break with a view to a winter purchase.
As revealed in the latest edition of Tuttosport (via Football Italia), Juventus could be willing to sanction an early January departure given that the 21-year-old has fallen down the pecking order in Turin.
A fee of €40m has been touted, which, let's be frank, neither United (with their cemented centre-half pairing) nor Arsenal (have no money) are going to pay in the mid-season. That leaves Milan, who would only be keen on a loan, so that's more likely, but still, unlikely.
One Pereira, Two Pereira, Three....
United have a decent track record of signing players from Sporting CP. Nani, I think his name was? There was also Cristiano Ronaldo too, once upon a time.
Anyway they've set their sights on another talent in the form of West Brom winger Matheus Pereira. The 23-year-old is currently at the Hawthorns on a season-long loan from the Portuguese club, with his fine form catching the eye of a number of clubs, but United in particular, claim the Mirror.
The Baggies have the option to make the deal permanent for £8.25m, but that supposedly won't put the Red Devils off.
Three goals and six assists have helped propel Slaven Bilic's side up to the top of the Championship, but surely Ole Gunnar Solskjaer has bigger fish to fry than the pacy winger...
PSG Join Hunt for Jadon Sancho
Paris Saint-Germain and United are set to go head-to-head for Jadon Sancho as the French club seek a replacement for the (eventually to depart) Neymar Jr.
United have been long-term admirers of the English forward but PSG have made the 19-year-old their number one target, according to the Express, who claim they will hijack the Red Devils' move for the £120m-rated star.
Having been hauled off in the first-half of Borussia Dortmund's 4-0 loss to Bayern Munich, speculation get ramped up to full throttle that Sancho could leave the Bundesliga outfit, with Thomas Tuchel's side taking note.
Basically, everybody wants to sign Sancho. Why? Because he's a darn good footballer. Will any of these rumours subsidise anytime soon? No, absolutely not. Will there be another twist? Yes, probably tomorrow. What should you do? Keep reading 90min's transfer rumours, that's what.
The Most Logical Replacement for Edinson Cavani Revealed
We saved the best for last. Believe you me.
Note: This comes courtesy of an 'exclusive' and is a genuine report.
Edinson Cavani is all-but wrapped up to head to LA Galaxy as the ideal replacement for Zlatan Ibrahimovic, apparently. That, is a logical move. Two beastly strikers who have scored goals wherever they've been, heading into the twilight point of their careers. Like-for-like, almost.
If you're replacing a striker of Cavani's quality, naturally the first port of call would be to eye another striker, right? Someone like, say, Adam Lallana?
Wait, what? Well, that's what the Mirror are saying. Yes, truly. I'm not joking.
It is claimed that the 31-year-old midfielder is a transfer target to replace the Uruguayan striker. That aside, Lallana is unable to get a game for Liverpool, has a terrible injury record, and scoops £7m-per-year in the Premier League. It genuinely begs belief. It is utter tosh.
That said, it provided a decent chuckle, so cheers for that, Mirror.