You gotta love the Premier League. It's home to some of the best football on the planet, but it's also home to some of the stupidest sporting moments you're ever likely to see.
There's fighting, drama and mistakes everywhere you look, but that's all part of the fun. Would we even support football if it wasn't chaotic almost all the time?
Let's see what English football had to offer us this week.
Oh Captain, My Captain
Who did it better? RT for Jose Like for Xhaka pic.twitter.com/3CGYOb8oAT— KING (@jackfrost8) October 30, 2019
Granit Xhaka...you good?
The relationship between Arsenal fans and club-captain Xhaka is about as frosty as the tips of a 90s boyband singer's hair (hint - that's frosty). It's mad what telling your own fans to "f**k off" will do to you.
The biggest question coming out of the whole situations is: will Xhaka apologise?
Emery helping Xhaka with an apology pic.twitter.com/25iqVUnOgs— Simpsons Arsenal (@SimpsonsArsenal) October 30, 2019
Xhaka needs to post this on IG man, just for the carnage. No apology, nothing. Just that. pic.twitter.com/KrrRptWSLW— James (@smhjaames) October 29, 2019
The only apology I want to hear from Xhaka pic.twitter.com/5IbkQiSQo4— The Chief (@Macho_Grande1) October 29, 2019
Yeah, all the drama isn't ideal really.
The team hasn't been great. Xhaka hasn't been great. Unai Emery hasn't been great. Basically, not a lot is going great for the Gunners.
Unai Emery starting Ozil is him putting his Arsenal career on the line ..— Timo-Pekko Nieminen (@Lord_of_d_Memes) October 29, 2019
It's now up to Mesut Ozil to either show us what we are missing or
help Emery dig his own grave.
Win win for Emery Out merchant once Ozil goes into Ghost mode
Or is it?! pic.twitter.com/FkJD4u8VDx
Mattéo Guen-Doesn't Know How to Tackle
NFL’s at Wembley... 路♂️ pic.twitter.com/QOkyetV1dh— Wilfried Zaha (@wilfriedzaha) October 27, 2019
They always say that defending wins games. A last-ditch challenge can be the difference between success and defeat, and Mattéo Guendouzi knows that.
However, he might take that too far.
Why use your feet to tackle when you can just use your entire body? It worked for St. Louis Rams linebacker Mike Jones at Super Bowl XXXIV, it worked for WWE heavyweight champion Goldberg, and it worked for Guendouzi.
I absolutely love Guendouzi's "tackle" on Zaha at the death yesterday.— David Stafford (@djstaffs1) October 28, 2019
If only Steve Nicol did that to Michael Thomas back in '89 there would be a statue commemorating it outside Anfield today
Mateo Guendouzi aka Afro Boy now give Zaha a whole WWE type spear yc pic.twitter.com/MZ7JYcech5— Descendent of Alfred (@BushelleWith2Ls) October 27, 2019
I think they call it...cynical?
You Nine to See it
BREAKING NEWS! SOUTHAMPTON AREN'T VERY GOOD!
Wait, what do you mean you already knew that?
Their 9-0 loss to Leicester City really was something special and, of course, the internet went mad for it all.
We don't deserve Jeff Stelling — Soccer AM (@SoccerAM) October 29, 2019
What a reply this is to crush Le Tissier after Southampton's 9-0 defeat pic.twitter.com/BJtuHszDgS
Southampton: What you gonna do to us tonight? Leicester: ... https://t.co/ZIODToL4d0— Harry Calvert (@HarryCalvert97) October 25, 2019
Not even sure I can applaud those Southampton fans who stayed to the end. Have some self respect. Sitting in traffic would be better.— Graham Ruthven (@grahamruthven) October 25, 2019
3 – Manchester United (Rashford, Pogba, Martial) have had three different players miss a Premier League penalty within a single season for only the second time, and for the first time since 2012/13 (van Persie, Rooney, Chicharito). Practice. #NORMNU pic.twitter.com/CTUPkPh38R— OptaJoe (@OptaJoe) October 27, 2019
Ask fans what the easiest way to score a goal is, and most will tell you that it's a penalty. Just kick it at the goal, and you've got a good chance of scoring.
However, ask Manchester United fans what the easiest way to score is, and they'll all just run away before even answering.
Penalty awarded to Manchester United— U N C L E C O S T Y (@Uncle_Costy) October 27, 2019
Here's an idea - ever tried actually scoring them?